the-immortal-cptn-jack-sparrow:
the-immortal-cptn-jack-sparrow:
the-immortal-cptn-jack-sparrow:
the-immortal-cptn-jack-sparrow:
the-immortal-cptn-jack-sparrow:
Jack gave a slight scoff. You were blinded by intercourse, lad. A little boy who just wanted to be in bed with his little girl. Of course, that girl is gone now, isn’t she?
I was not! I married Rapunzel! You honestly think I married her just for sex?
That’s precisely what I think! After just a few, if any less, months of dating, you two decide to get married. A lovely bond that can’t be broken…
Unless the latter of the two decides to leave…
Forever.
I can get sex without marrying a girl! I did it before I met Rapunzel. If I just wanted sex I would have never gotten married and would still be having one night stands with drunk chicks.
Jack raises an eyebrow. One night stands with drunken chicks, eh? I see you in a whole new light! Good, good. Now I can take you to Tortuga.
How is my past a good thing? What is a Tortuga?
Your past is a good thing, because it will indefinitely help you in the future. What is it, you ask? That’s where Tortuga comes along. It isn’t a “what”, it’s a “where”. Tortuga is a city right next to the sea, where all men are never alone. Savvy?
well, you see I’m not alone, I’m engaged. Call me stupid but I’m trying teh marriage thing again. Your offer sounds appealing but my pending nuptials will have to make me decline it.
AGAIN!? You’re going at the marriage again?! With whom are you locking yourself away with this time, eh?
Yes, i’m getting married again! You know that other Rapunzel I was talking to earlier? Ya, well she’s my fiancee
Your fiancee! But what if she doesn’t take it as well as the other Rapunzel did? What if she ignores all communicative attempts?
That’s just the chance that I’ll have to take. Everything could go perfect or it could end terribly. That can happen with any relationship.
I sincerely hope it goes wonderfully…
wrong.
Although, part of me wants you to succeed, just so I can see whether or not this new Rapunzel is worth Eugene at all.
oh how kind of you? Why would you hope that? I know you’re not nice but wanting my relationship to fail?
Who would’ve thought, eh? I’m such an unpredictable man.
Yes, it’s one of your most redeaming qualities
You don’t have to tell me twice.
+the-immortal-cptn-jack-sparrow:
the-immortal-cptn-jack-sparrow:
the-immortal-cptn-jack-sparrow:
the-immortal-cptn-jack-sparrow:
Jack gave a slight scoff. You were blinded by intercourse, lad. A little boy who just wanted to be in bed with his little girl. Of course, that girl is gone now, isn’t she?
I was not! I married Rapunzel! You honestly think I married her just for sex?
That’s precisely what I think! After just a few, if any less, months of dating, you two decide to get married. A lovely bond that can’t be broken…
Unless the latter of the two decides to leave…
Forever.
I can get sex without marrying a girl! I did it before I met Rapunzel. If I just wanted sex I would have never gotten married and would still be having one night stands with drunk chicks.
Jack raises an eyebrow. One night stands with drunken chicks, eh? I see you in a whole new light! Good, good. Now I can take you to Tortuga.
How is my past a good thing? What is a Tortuga?
Your past is a good thing, because it will indefinitely help you in the future. What is it, you ask? That’s where Tortuga comes along. It isn’t a “what”, it’s a “where”. Tortuga is a city right next to the sea, where all men are never alone. Savvy?
well, you see I’m not alone, I’m engaged. Call me stupid but I’m trying teh marriage thing again. Your offer sounds appealing but my pending nuptials will have to make me decline it.
AGAIN!? You’re going at the marriage again?! With whom are you locking yourself away with this time, eh?
Yes, i’m getting married again! You know that other Rapunzel I was talking to earlier? Ya, well she’s my fiancee
Your fiancee! But what if she doesn’t take it as well as the other Rapunzel did? What if she ignores all communicative attempts?
That’s just the chance that I’ll have to take. Everything could go perfect or it could end terribly. That can happen with any relationship.
I sincerely hope it goes wonderfully…
wrong.
Although, part of me wants you to succeed, just so I can see whether or not this new Rapunzel is worth Eugene at all.
oh how kind of you? Why would you hope that? I know you’re not nice but wanting my relationship to fail?
Who would’ve thought, eh? I’m such an unpredictable man.
+the-immortal-cptn-jack-sparrow:
the-immortal-cptn-jack-sparrow:
the-immortal-cptn-jack-sparrow:
Jack gave a slight scoff. You were blinded by intercourse, lad. A little boy who just wanted to be in bed with his little girl. Of course, that girl is gone now, isn’t she?
I was not! I married Rapunzel! You honestly think I married her just for sex?
That’s precisely what I think! After just a few, if any less, months of dating, you two decide to get married. A lovely bond that can’t be broken…
Unless the latter of the two decides to leave…
Forever.
I can get sex without marrying a girl! I did it before I met Rapunzel. If I just wanted sex I would have never gotten married and would still be having one night stands with drunk chicks.
Jack raises an eyebrow. One night stands with drunken chicks, eh? I see you in a whole new light! Good, good. Now I can take you to Tortuga.
How is my past a good thing? What is a Tortuga?
Your past is a good thing, because it will indefinitely help you in the future. What is it, you ask? That’s where Tortuga comes along. It isn’t a “what”, it’s a “where”. Tortuga is a city right next to the sea, where all men are never alone. Savvy?
well, you see I’m not alone, I’m engaged. Call me stupid but I’m trying teh marriage thing again. Your offer sounds appealing but my pending nuptials will have to make me decline it.
AGAIN!? You’re going at the marriage again?! With whom are you locking yourself away with this time, eh?
Yes, i’m getting married again! You know that other Rapunzel I was talking to earlier? Ya, well she’s my fiancee
Your fiancee! But what if she doesn’t take it as well as the other Rapunzel did? What if she ignores all communicative attempts?
That’s just the chance that I’ll have to take. Everything could go perfect or it could end terribly. That can happen with any relationship.
I sincerely hope it goes wonderfully…
wrong.
Although, part of me wants you to succeed, just so I can see whether or not this new Rapunzel is worth Eugene at all.
+Wow, John. What a jump from interlacing fingers to…that other thing. You never told us it went in yet. You can’t just jump from fingers to that. You have to gradually move down the body.
+the-immortal-cptn-jack-sparrow:
the-immortal-cptn-jack-sparrow:
Jack gave a slight scoff. You were blinded by intercourse, lad. A little boy who just wanted to be in bed with his little girl. Of course, that girl is gone now, isn’t she?
I was not! I married Rapunzel! You honestly think I married her just for sex?
That’s precisely what I think! After just a few, if any less, months of dating, you two decide to get married. A lovely bond that can’t be broken…
Unless the latter of the two decides to leave…
Forever.
I can get sex without marrying a girl! I did it before I met Rapunzel. If I just wanted sex I would have never gotten married and would still be having one night stands with drunk chicks.
Jack raises an eyebrow. One night stands with drunken chicks, eh? I see you in a whole new light! Good, good. Now I can take you to Tortuga.
How is my past a good thing? What is a Tortuga?
Your past is a good thing, because it will indefinitely help you in the future. What is it, you ask? That’s where Tortuga comes along. It isn’t a “what”, it’s a “where”. Tortuga is a city right next to the sea, where all men are never alone. Savvy?
well, you see I’m not alone, I’m engaged. Call me stupid but I’m trying teh marriage thing again. Your offer sounds appealing but my pending nuptials will have to make me decline it.
AGAIN!? You’re going at the marriage again?! With whom are you locking yourself away with this time, eh?
Yes, i’m getting married again! You know that other Rapunzel I was talking to earlier? Ya, well she’s my fiancee
Your fiancee! But what if she doesn’t take it as well as the other Rapunzel did? What if she ignores all communicative attempts?
+the-immortal-cptn-jack-sparrow:
Jack gave a slight scoff. You were blinded by intercourse, lad. A little boy who just wanted to be in bed with his little girl. Of course, that girl is gone now, isn’t she?
I was not! I married Rapunzel! You honestly think I married her just for sex?
That’s precisely what I think! After just a few, if any less, months of dating, you two decide to get married. A lovely bond that can’t be broken…
Unless the latter of the two decides to leave…
Forever.
I can get sex without marrying a girl! I did it before I met Rapunzel. If I just wanted sex I would have never gotten married and would still be having one night stands with drunk chicks.
Jack raises an eyebrow. One night stands with drunken chicks, eh? I see you in a whole new light! Good, good. Now I can take you to Tortuga.
How is my past a good thing? What is a Tortuga?
Your past is a good thing, because it will indefinitely help you in the future. What is it, you ask? That’s where Tortuga comes along. It isn’t a “what”, it’s a “where”. Tortuga is a city right next to the sea, where all men are never alone. Savvy?
well, you see I’m not alone, I’m engaged. Call me stupid but I’m trying teh marriage thing again. Your offer sounds appealing but my pending nuptials will have to make me decline it.
AGAIN!? You’re going at the marriage again?! With whom are you locking yourself away with this time, eh?
+the-immortal-cptn-jack-sparrow:
the-immortal-cptn-jack-sparrow:
Bugger! You annoying little girl! Do you act this away around other adults? Or your parents? Or is it just me you’re being annoying with?
You’re the one being annoying! I didn’t even say anything to you! And my name’s not little girl. It’s Mertle, okay?
Mertle? What a strange name. I’ve never heard of that before. Where do you come from, lit—Mertle?
“I’m from Hawaii. Where are you from? You smell funny.” Mertle scrunched up her nose.
I’m not from any particular place. The sea, if you’ll have it, is where I am most of the time. And I do not smell funny. I smell perfectly fine.
+the-immortal-cptn-jack-sparrow:
the-immortal-cptn-jack-sparrow:
What? What do you mean she started following me? Are…are you saying that she…she left me in the first place?
“Well, I-” Helga cut off, frowning, “Sorry Sparrow.”
Sorry’s not enough, lass. I cannot believe you left me. Why did you do such a thing?
“Because I got busy… And lost track of people.”
“Lost track of people”?
You don’t simply “lost track of people”. You’d have to click “unfollow” to lose track of said people. You did it on purpose.
+the-immortal-cptn-jack-sparrow:
Aw, why not? I won’t tell anyone. I promise.
Alright then. If it’s so dearly important to you, you can keep your jar of dirt.
+